Who likes to be criticized? As a highly sensitive person and introvert, the scary feeling of being judged is intensified, as is the pain of being humiliated.
I had a grammar school teacher criticize me in front of the class. It had a long lasting affect about the way I felt about school. I was afraid to go to class and was never a good student.
I can still feel the “sting” of being criticized, but I’ve learned to work with it. I’ve done this through studying self-help information, going to seminars, and learning from life experience.
The fear of criticism hurt me in many ways. I had a lack of self-esteem, it stifled my creativity (a highly sensitive person strength), it made it harder for me to take initiative, and it discouraged me from taking risks.
The most important lessons that I have learned include:
- To question whether the person making the criticism is qualified to make the criticism.
- What is their motive? Do they want to help or hurt you?
- Is the criticism true? If it’s true and the person has your best interest at heart, what can you learn from this experience?
- People who wrongly criticize others build themselves up by tearing other people down. Nobody has the right to do this! It’s our responsibility to not let this happen.
Through a better understanding of myself and others, I’ve increased my self-esteem and have been able to successfully channel my ability to handle criticism .
How has criticism affected your life? What have you learned from the experience? How have you benefited from this? What do you still need to learn? I’m interested in any thoughts or comments that you have.
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Maybe I’m answering this from my current place of insecurity…but whatever, it’s the truth.
“How do you feel about being criticized” varies. If I trust the person criticizing, then I listen with openness. It’s a chance to learn and be a better person or have a new skill or whatever the criticism is about.
However, if I do not trust the person who is criticizing me then I take it personally…as it was most likely intended. If the person who is doing that criticizing is somebody I value, I let them know that I took it personally and that I need clarification.
But if the person who is doing the criticizing, is somebody of little presence or value in my life, then I just let it go.